I don’t necessarily agree but people say men are not emotional. I think their supposed lack of emotions has to do with the way they have been trained and expected to behave.
This is probably why people say when a man loves, he loves deeply because he doesn’t act as society expects of him around the one he loves. Unconsciously, he defies these expectations for this person.
Sometimes, when a man is doing all these, you still find him arguing he is not in love because it is hard for him to realise he is no longer behaving as expected.
The woman, on the other hand, is wondering why he is not voicing out what he obviously feels. Try to understand, there is a hundred percent chance he doesn’t know he is in love or that the love he feels is real.
Men, I know you want to know and differentiate if what you are feeling is real. I am here to help you out. If you can relate to the above, then this is for you.
You always want to hear her voice
Some people have a great voice and some people are not so lucky. But this doesn’t really matter to you if you love a woman, her voice could be all croaked and unpleasant but to you, it sounds like the angels serenading you. For some reason, hearing her voice makes you happy and smile. It has become a habit to hear her voice every day. Something seems missing from your day if you haven’t spoken to her that day. All these symptoms point to one thing; love.
You enjoy talking to her and confiding in her
Similar to the above, you always want to talk to her. You can talk to her for hours without realising the time has gone. You sometimes even lose sleep for her sake; even hearing her breathe over the phone makes you happy. You also find yourself telling her things you probably wouldn’t have told anybody else. You want to talk about your secrets and want her to understand. You want her to know everything about you.
You enjoy her company
You enjoy being around her. Being in her presence makes you happy. There is just something about being around her that fulfils and satisfies you. Even after spending hours with her, you still find yourself missing her and wanting to be around her again. It is almost like you cannot get enough. If you find yourself wanting to spend more time with her or not minding to cancel with your buddies to be around her, then buddy, you are in love.
Your buddies are beginning to poke fun at you for always mentioning her in conversations
Your friends are usually the ones who first notice you are changing. They notice you are talking about her a lot, they notice you tell them you are with her when they want to hang out or sometimes, you just blank out thinking about her when you are with them. When they start poking fun at you, then it is time to evaluate; you are either falling in love or already there.
You are constantly thinking about her
This is a no-brainer, really. As mentioned earlier, if you are always thinking about someone, if you are not there yet, then you are already on your way to the cupid’s city. When you are in love with someone, they are constantly on your mind.
You want her to meet people you care about, especially your mum
When you are in love, there is a tendency to want to shout it from the rooftop so the whole world can know. You, especially, want to tell the people you care about how you feel. Your best friend might be the first to know, your other friends and siblings next but when you find yourself wanting to tell your parents or for most guys, your mum, then don’t doubt it, what you feel is real.
You find yourself planning your life around her
When you are in love, you find that your life revolves around her. You start making plans for the present and the future that involves her. You ask for her opinion about decisions you want to make about your life and makes sure she appears there somehow.
She is the first person that comes to mind when something happens
Prior to meeting her, it was just your best friend, but now, she is also the first person you want to call when you get a promotion at work, have a row with your neighbour, get a coupon at the local grocery store and for any silly thing. You just want to tell her everything, silly or not.
You are uncharacteristically patient with her
Yeah, she is crazy sometimes and drives you crazy but you find that what you might not easily tolerate from others, you are more patient and understanding when it comes to her.
You know her flaws but you still want to be around her
Most people erroneously think love doesn’t see flaws. If it is so blind it doesn’t recognise the flaws of the other person, it is not love, it is infatuation. Love is “she upsets me when she does this or I wish she wouldn’t do this but I love her.” You know all the things you wish she will work on and become better at but you still can’t live without her.
You want her to be happy
Love will always want the object of love to be happy. You are ready to make sacrifices to make her happy, sometimes, even your feelings. If you can sacrifice what you feel for her because you know she would be happier with someone else, then you are in love. If you are infatuated or obsessed, you wouldn’t readily release her even if you know that is what will make her happy, you will be more interested in keeping her to make you happy. Love is sacrificial and selfless.
You trust her
Love is trusting. If there is no trust in love, then there is no point. Love is not easy and sometimes, you get jealous if you see her with other guys but you don’t seek to possess her; that is obsession and not love. Love is freeing and you are sure she has your back wherever she is.
There is something about being in love that makes you feel powerful and invisible like you can conquer the world, knowing that there is someone out there who gets your back and will be there for you. If you feel this way, don’t waste time letting her know it, what you feel for her is real. Remember it is not enough to feel just one of this, that could be infatuation but if you can relate to most of all of the points listed, congratulations, you have found love.