I can speak for myself (and I think for many women out there) that there were many times I thought I was in love and it turned out I was just in like or worse, infatuated.
When we were teenagers or even in our early twenties, it might not matter so much that we could not differentiate infatuation from love but when we get older into our mid-twenties, there is no longer time to waste being infatuated and not knowing the real thing. Not only would we be wasting the man’s time, but we would also be wasting our time as well.
This is what made it necessary for me to intensively and comprehensively research on the signs present in a woman to indicate to her that she is in love. And I figured if I have discovered it, the most humane thing to do would be to share the knowledge with my fellow women.
Signs that You Are in Love with Him
He is always in your thoughts
If someone is not constantly on your mind and if you do not miss them when they are not around you, then chances are you are not in love with the person. Now, when you are infatuated, you will also constantly think about that person but the same thing applies when you are in love too. It doesn’t mean that you desperately have to be around them but it means that they occupy a huge part of your mind and heart.
You enjoy his company
You will find yourself constantly wanting to be in his presence. You just enjoy being around him. There is a certain pleasant feeling that being in his presence gives you. This is a big pointer that you have gone beyond like to love.
You prioritize him over other male friends
Most girls have a number of male friends or at least, acquaintances; they may be co-workers, classmates, neighbours, church members or a co-member of a club you belong to. There are usually around you but when you find that you have picked one out whose calls, messages, meetings you prioritise over others, then you are heading towards love.
You enjoy talking to him
When you are in love, there is just so much to talk about. You enjoy talking to him and hearing him talk. It is commonly said that women talk a lot but the actual fact is that women talk to men they care about. If they don’t care for a guy, they wouldn’t be talking to him except she is naturally talkative. If you are in love, you will want him to know every single detail of your life and you will also be curious about him and so will ask many questions.
You are always talking about him
Your friends will help you with this; they most likely will notice this about you before you do and call your attention to it. When your statements are filled with “John said …,” “I and John …,” “John and I …” and all the other variants, then John is occupying your heart.
You value his opinion
A woman who is in love wants to hear the opinion of the man she is in love with. She will tell him about critical decisions or issues going on in her life and ask for his opinion. When you find you are beginning to want to run your decisions by him to hear what he has to say, then you are most likely in love with him.
You know his flaws but you still cannot stay away
Infatuation doesn’t see flaws, the object of the infatuation is usually flawless and perfect to the subject. But love is realistic and it doesn’t rob you of your senses. You know his flaws but you cannot stay away from him, then that is more like love. Now, it is important to notice that if the flaw we are dealing with is abusive to you, then you are no longer in love, it is either obsession or Stockholm syndrome. But if the flaw is minor, something that doesn’t exactly hurt you but just pisses you off and you still have feelings for him, then you already have a place in cupid’s land.
You plan your future with him in mind
Most women already planned their wedding right from when they were kids; some have their children’s names ready. If you see your future and he is constantly the one you see standing beside you, you are most likely in love.
You want him to meet the people you care about
You want to shout it on the rooftop, you want to announce it to the world that you have feelings for someone. But if you are a private person, most likely, you want him to meet your best friend, family and friends and you want them to get along.
Most things remind you of him, especially things you know he will like
Practically everything reminds you of him if you are in love. Most especially, when you see things you know he would like or things he is interested in, you think of him immediately. And even for things you aren’t sure he would like, you wonder if he would and put it in mind to ask him next time you meet him.
You genuinely want him to be happy
When you are in love with someone, their happiness is important to you. Sometimes, even if it means them not ending up with you but you know they are happy, you are ready to let them go. Love will wish he is with you but love will be more interested in his happiness. Obsession or infatuation doesn’t care if he is happy or not, as far as he is with you. if you feel the former, then you are definitely in love.
You trust him
Yes, love is trusting. This is because love is based on knowledge. You actually know this person and you have feelings for the person based on that knowledge. So you want them to be free and not necessarily tied to you and you trust that they would not cause you pain.
It is important to remember that just one point is not enough to conclude you are in love. It needs to be a culmination of at least 8 of the points above because you could be infatuated and still exhibit some of these signs but definitely not all of them. If you can see most or all the signs, then congratulations, you have found love.