Okay, you are probably waiting for me to talk about whether you should kiss or not on the first date.
Yeah, I am sorry to disappoint you but that is not exactly what I would be doing here.
Should you kiss or not on first date? That is a decision you are going to have to make on your own.
But not to worry, what I would do is present you with information on what kissing on first date means and represent for most people, so next time you go on that first date you can make an informed decision on whether or not you want to get it over with or postpone it and build up to it.
Even though based on the dynamics of the world now, kissing should not really be a big deal, kissing is still a big deal, especially the first kiss. So it is normal not to want to mess it up and wanting to be sure you are on the same page with the other person.
Humans are complex and will always be complex beings, modernization or not. So it is not really easy determining what kissing on a first date means to your date. But generally, there are merits and demerits of kissing on a first date.
Having an idea of what the pros and cons are will help you decide.
MERITS OF KISSING ON FIRST DATE
Here are the merits of kissing on a first date:
- The major merit of a first date kiss is that there is chemistry and you want to communicate that to your date. Usually, people do not proceed to kiss a date that they feel nothing for. So kissing could be a way to communicate that they can feel sparks flying and they want you.
- They want to communicate to you how they feel and also find out if you feel the same way. A kiss could communicate how someone feels about you by the way they react to it.
- Basically, your date might go in for the kiss and the way you react to it will let them know whether you are into it or just indulging them, especially if part of their reason for kissing in the first place was to find out how you feel about it.
- Also, you are communicating to your date that you are interested in a second date and many more dates and you want to feel their thoughts on that.
- First date kiss could also communicate that you are modern and not a prude or old-fashioned. For a date who is not looking for a prude, this could be a major turn on. That person wants to know that you are not easily offended by sexual things and you are adventurous.
- Also, a kiss could help you figure out if your date actually wants a relationship or just an avenue to get in bed with you. This could get tricky as both of you can get carried away and proceed to bed, especially, if the kiss happened inside the house, with the mood just right. But sometimes, if your date starts getting all pushy to have sex with you after the kiss, it could be a serious red flag.
DEMERITS OF KISSING ON FIRST DATE
- On the flip side, a first kiss does not always mean there is chemistry; it could as well be a goodbye kiss. People are complex like earlier stated and some people kiss so as to “compensate” the date due to their lack of interest in a second date.
- The most obvious of all the demerits of a first date kiss is that you don’t know your date that well. Who else have they been kissing? Do they have mouth odour or some kind of mouth disease? What is their hygiene like? All these could be a turn off for kissing on a first date.
- Again, you just might give your date false hope by kissing on a first date. It is possible you think you are into the person and maybe that is due to their looks or the way they talk or for whatever reason, then you find after a second or third date that you don’t really care for them like you thought you did. But because you have already kissed, it might be difficult now communicating your new-found discovery, which might be tantamount to giving off mixed signals.
- Another demerit of kissing on a first date is not knowing if you and the person are on the same page concerning kissing on a first date. Some people might really like you but they prefer to build up to a first kiss or they want to get to know you a whole lot better before kissing. Kissing them might give them the impression that you do not share the same values or look at things the same way.
Having discussed the merits and demerits of kissing on a first date, I will confess that it is still tricky making a decision. So sometimes, it is easier to go with the flow, don’t push it, don’t expect it but just let the date progress naturally.
The truth is, no two dates can be the same; some you would end up kissing on a first date, some you won’t and in both cases, one might end up a fairy tale and one might end up a nightmare. There is just honestly no way to tell these things
I would advise you to go on a first date relaxed, ready to enjoy yourself and go with the flow.