After a breakup, there’s this inevitable breakdown phase that follows.
Your world gets shattered in all directions; it’s messy.
Breakups are no easy phase in the walk of life.
They hit like a punch to the heart.
Just like any wound, it brings pain and agony and the confusion of figuring out how to start anew.
And to be real, there’s that nagging shame, especially from what others might think, especially if you’ve turned down other potential suitors because of your commitment.
But the thing here is that fighting according to the waves of emotions can flip you over.
Take it easy.
Sure, the temptation to do something wild might hit, but you really don’t have to.
Sometimes, you’re so emotionally wrapped up that you don’t even realize there are a few no-nos post-breakup.
Believe me, getting caught up in these things will only prolong the healing process, and some of them even have a legal side.
We get it.
It’s tough.
But seriously, consider making up your mind to steer clear of them.
These steps might not be a magic cure, but they’ll definitely help you move past the pain.
Check out the list below for things you should definitely avoid after a breakup.
8 Things A Woman Should Never Do After A Breakup
1. Do not keep any communication line open
Summon up your courage for this.
Cut off all communication with him.
There’s really no need to keep his contact.
If you’re still holding onto any communication, you’ll find yourself yearning, wishing he’d just pick up the phone.
Your heart will race every time something comes through from that line.
Whether it’s a call or a beep, you’ll be secretly hoping it’s him.
But guess what? You don’t need that.
No.
Communication is a powerful connection, and when you’re not sharing it, you start drifting apart.
That’s why even married people are always reminded to keep communication strong.
Once it’s gone, that longing will fade with time.
2. Do not call him
I get it, and those urges can be tough.
Totally normal, though.
You may feel like calling.
But resist the temptation to call him seriously.
Watch out for accidentally dialing his number out of habit—delete that contact.
Without the number, no accidental calls.
Even if you hear he’s talking trash, resist the urge to dial.
I know questions might pop up later, but hold off on reaching out.
Don’t let pain get the best of you.
Try to hold your emotions.
As the African saying goes, “spit out doesn’t go back in.”
Let the past stay in the past.
3. Avoid being around his friends and family
This one, too, might be a bit tough, but you’ve got this.
Friends and family, they love throwing questions at you.
And those questions will stir up feelings you really don’t need.
It’s fine—they’re just showing they care, but honestly, you don’t need that right now.
Seeing them will keep bringing up memories of your ex.
Some might even drop bad news, sharing what he said behind your back or trying to give you some gist about his new girlfriend not measuring up.
But hey, that’s not your concern anymore.
You’ve moved on.
So, just dodge his people to steer clear of unnecessary sympathy.
4. Stay away from stalking them on social media
It’s so common in this digital age.
It’s so easy to peek into someone’s life on social media without them even knowing.
You might catch yourself constantly checking their posts to stay in the loop.
The urge to find out if there’s a new girlfriend or if they’re genuinely happy can be strong.
But honestly, you don’t need that.
It’s just going to hurt you.
Also, it’ll keep you stuck and focused on their life instead of taking care of yourself.
Do yourself a favor, and unfriend them on social media.
That way, you won’t accidentally stumble upon their posts and end up scrolling through their timeline.
It’s a small step, but it can make a big difference in moving on.
5. Don’t ignore your self-care
In the midst of a post-breakup phase, it’s easy to lose sight of who you are.
You might feel so broken that your well-being takes a back seat, especially after a breakup or dealing with depression.
But remember, you’ve got to stand up to depression.
Sure, your ex might have walked away, but they can’t take away the essence of you.
You are in control of your happiness, not them or anyone else.
So, get involved in your hobbies, hang out with friends, hit the gym, do what makes you happy, and keep rocking your style.
Great things are waiting for you, and you shouldn’t let one relationship define your future.
Don’t forget yourself in the process.
You are more important than anything else – actually, you’re the most important entity to hold onto through it all.
6. Don’t go to places you go to when you were dating
Hey, remember that awesome restaurant you loved?
I get that it was your go-to even before meeting him, but since you guys used to hang out there a bunch, maybe give it a pass for now.
The same goes for your usual evening hangout at the park – steer clear.
Chances are, he’s hitting those spots with his new girl, and running into them could be a major emotional issue.
And those places might bring back memories you’re better off leaving behind.
So, just take a break from the spots you two used to love when you were a thing.
7. Don’t keep his things
Give back anything of his that’s at your place – clothes, phone chargers, shoes, books, or whatever else.
No need to hang on to reminders, it’s better to clear them out.
The same goes for presents, cards, and notes, too – you don’t need that stuff anymore, so pass it along.
And if you want to keep anything of sentimental value, like a gift or a photo, put it in a box and stow it away somewhere so it’s out of sight and not taking up headspace.
Take the time to really let go of any physical items that keep you connected.
Delete photos and shred any hard copies – you don’t need those memories weighing you down.
Returning what should be returned and letting go of the rest will help you heal and move forward.
8. Don’t try getting back at them with a rebound
No, this will hurt you more.
Trust me, going down this path will backfire.
If the person you’re rebounding with catches on, they’ll feel used and probably break up with you too.
Don’t bother trying to make your ex feel guilty, it’ll just leave you feeling down.
Just walk away and focus on finding your right match.
Your perfect person will come along when you’re living your best life.
Final thoughts
If someone decides to break up with you, it’s probably a sign that they’re not the right fit for you.
If they’re meant to be in your life, they’ll find their way back on their own.
No need to stress, argue, or force things.
Let time do its thing, it’s a great healer.
Don’t let their departure put a pause on your life.
Your life belongs to you, so make sure you take good care of it.