Having nothing to discuss with your boyfriend isn’t a huge issue.
But sometimes it can become a big deal depending on the mood or the situation.
I’ve experienced it too.
I remember this one date with my boyfriend.
We were all chatty and fun before we left home, but when we got to our date spot, the conversation just vanished.
He was engrossed in his phone, and I was on mine, but deep down, I felt uneasy because of the silence.
Now, let’s talk about this.
If the silence bothers you, and you’re not at ease with it, it’s a sign you should pay attention to.
Trust your gut here.
Because as long as you both are alive and well, there will always be things to talk about.
The only reason for silence could be that maybe your boyfriend needs some personal space, or perhaps you both need some time out with other people.
In this blog post, I’ll share some tips on things to do to fill that awkward silence when it descends upon your relationship.
My Boyfriend And I Don’t Have Anything To Talk About: What To Do About It
1. Give each other space
You know what?
It’s perfectly fine to have those moments when words just don’t flow.
It’s normal, and silence can be just as comforting.
So, don’t feel pressured to fill every gap with talks because that can sometimes lead to talking nonsense just for the sake of talking.
You can enjoy a quiet stroll together, watch a movie without feeling the need to comment on every scene, or simply rest your head on his lap while reading a book, with him scrolling through his phone – and vice versa.
You just need to find the balance.
Of course, you don’t want to let the silence stretch on for too long, as that’s when negativity might creep in on you unaware.
Giving each other space and enjoying each other’s presence, even in silence, can be wonderfully bonding.
Whether it’s cuddling up while reading or watching a movie without a single word spoken, remember, it’s absolutely fine.
The best relationships are the ones in which you can be comfortable and relaxed, not anxious to fill every single second with conversation.
Sometimes, it’s truly enough just being together without needing to say anything at all.
2. Revisit your shared interests
We all know that the start of every love story is beautifully captivating.
The things you shared, the tale of how you both crossed paths, and even those inside jokes.
They all add a special charm to your journey.
Even the mishaps and blunders can become endearing in hindsight.
Revisiting your shared interests is taking a delightful stroll down memory lane, revisiting the treasures you might have left behind as you ventured through life.
Dust off those cherished memories and share them with your boyfriend.
Recall the favorite TV shows that once had you both hooked, the games that brought out your competitive spirit, or the friends who were your partners in crime.
Maybe even reminisce about the places you used to call home and the stories that unfolded within those walls.
It’s a nostalgic visitation that brings joy and laughter, a reminder of where it all began, the place of pure, unfiltered love.
3. Ask open-ended questions
Avoid getting one-word responses by steering clear of questions like, “How was your day?”
No, that won’t do the trick.
The secret to sparking engaging conversations lies in asking open-ended questions, such as, “Tell me about the most interesting thing you experienced today?”
These types of questions are conversation catalysts.
When you ask them, the other person is encouraged to share more because they allow for in-depth responses.
As they talk more, your conversations naturally become longer and richer.
You get to share your thoughts, and they get to open up as well.
This paves the way for seamless transitions from one topic to another.
So, say goodbye to those mundane, one-answer questions and opt for questions that ignite discussions.
Also, try to break free from the routine.
Instead of your usual “How are you?” consider a different approach.
Say something like, “I’ve noticed you’re positively glowing today, so tell me, what’s been going on?”
Or, try a more caring approach with, “You sound a bit different today. Is everything alright?”
What I am saying is to ask questions that keep the conversation flowing, not ones that bring it to a screeching halt.
4. Share your day
Sharing your day is a great way to have meaningful conversations.
You can talk about what happened during your day, even if it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.
In fact, sometimes, the not-so-great experiences can lead to some interesting discussions.
For example, let’s say you accidentally dropped your phone.
Sharing this with your boyfriend can spark a conversation.
You might discuss what led to that mishap, or he might share a similar incident from his own life.
This can lead to a whole bunch of topics to chat about.
Also, by sharing your day, you both can learn how to handle similar situations better in the future.
So, don’t hold back.
Tell him about both the good and not-so-good experiences you’ve had.
5. Explore new topics together
I often stress that relationships, matters of love, demand daily effort.
It’s not a set-and-forget kind of deal.
You’ve got to put in the work consistently.
What I am saying here is that you’ve got to keep things fresh.
You don’t want to chat about the same stuff every single day.
Life changes, and the news can be a handy tool to keep your conversations lively.
Look for topics that resonate with your situation, whether it’s about daily life, faith, politics, or even your relationship.
Don’t hesitate to welcome new ideas into your talks.
Seek out something that challenges you to step outside your routine.
Just to stay engaged and evolve together.
6. Be playful
Laughter helps you bond and become closer as a couple.
When you laugh together, it creates wonderful memories and makes your conversations a whole lot more enjoyable.
Not only that, but laughter is a stress-buster.
When you play and share hearty laughs, you release the tension and worries of the day.
Imagine having someone who’s always there to play with you, engage in discussions that bring laughter, and create enjoyable moments.
You’d naturally want to spend more time with that person.
So, don’t hesitate, play together.
Infuse some fun into your life and your conversations.
Engage in playful banter and share funny stories to make your talks enjoyable.
You can even tease your boyfriend about his football skills, how you can play better than him (even though you can not play football at all), just for a good-natured laugh.
7. Make plans for the future
Talking about the future and making plans for your dreams is very motivating and can make your conversations much more meaningful.
You can inspire each other by discussing your personal goals and what you both want to achieve in life.
This opens the door for deeper discussions and allows you to share your lives together.
Offering different perspectives on your goals and plans.
This kind of positive criticism helps you see things more clearly, understand better, and handle your goals and plans more effectively.
8. Be interested and empathetic
It’s important not to dominate conversations with yourself when you talk to your boyfriend.
If you always make it about you, he might start feeling like he doesn’t want to talk because he never gets a chance to share.
To make your conversations better, be genuinely interested in what’s going on in his life.
Show empathy by listening and being fully present when he talks.
This encourages him to open up more, and then you can provide advice or rub minds together to find solutions.
Showing that you are interested and empathetic means you should be a good listener, not just the one doing all the talking.
This way, your boyfriend will be more inclined to engage in conversations.
It’s not that you have nothing to talk about; you just have to create space for him to share.
As I mentioned in the introduction, not having much to talk about isn’t always a big deal, but sometimes it can become a significant issue.
It’s important to recognize if the silence is because you both need a quiet moment or if there’s an underlying problem.
If there is an ongoing issue, address it.
Work on finding a solution and discuss how to reach a common ground.
But if there are no underlying issues, it’s perfectly fine to enjoy some moments of silence.
Everyone needs a break sometimes.
If the silence persists for a longer period, you can follow the steps we’ve discussed above to encourage conversation.
Life is too short to let moments slip by without meaningful conversations.
Keep the communication flowing and strengthen the connection you share with your boyfriend.