Every day, we are confronted with situations that may leave us confused.
One of these situations is when a married man tells a woman outside his marriage that he misses her.
When this happens, the woman wonders if it is a platonic expression or if it has a romantic inclination.
When a married man says he misses you, and you are confused about what he may mean, the first thing you want to do is understand the context.
To do this, you must ask two vital questions.
First, what is the relationship between you and the married man?
Are you both related by blood?
Is he your friend?
Is it a non-biological father-child relationship, or is it a mentor-mentee relationship?
Is he a man who has been showing signs of romantic interest in you?
Second question: what led to this statement?
He hasn’t seen you in a long time and wishes to see you?
He sees you frequently but feels like he should see you more often?
The “I miss you” mentor who has not seen you in a long time will definitely sound different from the one from the man who has been hitting on you.
There are several meanings to “I miss you” from a married man to a woman to whom he is not married, and there are also ways to handle the situation.
When A Married Man Says He Misses You: What it Means?
1. Innocent Nostalgia
A married man who says he is missing you might just be feeling nostalgic remembering the times you both have shared together and looking forward to sharing those times again.
These memories might be of the times you both spent together with family and friends.
Those times that the busyness of life has not afforded you both an opportunity to recreate.
So when a married man says he misses you, it could be an innocent expression of nostalgia.
In this situation, what you both need to do is to plan a weekend getaway or a trip with other family members and friends, including his wife.
This will help you all bond and recreate all those special memories.
2. Appreciation
When a married man who has been your friend says he misses you, It may also be an expression of appreciation for the help and support your friendship has brought him.
He could be missing the conversations and advice you have shared with him or the way you make him feel understood and valued.
He may not necessarily have any romantic inclinations toward you; he is just reaching out to let you know that he appreciates you and has not forgotten about your kindness even though he is married.
In this case, it is important to acknowledge his appreciation and continue being a supportive friend.
Remind him that your friendship has been a two-way street and that he has, too, brought positivity into your life.
3. Emotional Needs
There are also situations where a man who is married is experiencing emotional starvation.
This situation happens every day in our society, and in this case, the man may decide to seek emotional fulfillment outside his marriage basically because he is not getting it there.
So he looks for the first available person and starts with an “I miss you” text to see if she is open enough to let him in.
Sometimes, in this case, the man may not be seeking physical intimacy at all.
Just someone to fulfill his emotional needs.
However, the chances of this entanglement leading to a physical one are usually very high.
4. Infatuation or Attraction
You know when a man just sees something in you that stirs up romantic interest in him?
That is infatuation.
It may not be necessarily deeply rooted, but his expressing that he misses you at this point shows that he has an interest in you that is beyond platonic friendship.
He may be attracted to your physical appearance, personality, or both.
Infatuation is usually intense and short-lived, but it can also develop into genuine feelings of love over time.
And even though this infatuation is not deeply rooted, it is strong enough to result in infidelity if you give it the opportunity.
5. Seeking Your Company
When you have been friends with someone for a very long time, and marriage comes in to put a stricter boundary on the friendship, every now and then, you both will miss the freedom with which you were once friends and seek that company once again.
And this isn’t completely a bad thing.
Except there are things you both did back then that are unacceptable.
If your friendship was completely platonic, with the permission or company of his wife, you both can plan a get-together where you can create beautiful friendship memories once again.
6. Warning Sign
A married man telling you that he misses you may also be a warning alarm to let you know that you have let loose on your boundaries or overstepped his.
It might also be a sign to warn you of the fact that you are becoming emotionally entangled with a married man beyond what is acceptable.
When this alarm goes off, it tells you that you are beginning to do something unethical, which can cause pain to both of you and other people involved.
When A Married Man Says He Misses You: What To Do?
1. Communication and Clarity
After you have understood what it means when a married man says he misses you, you should be able to decide what it means for you based on your judgment.
If you have decided that it is a purely platonic expression with nothing attached, you may want to find a way to visit with him if that is convenient for you.
However, if you are still unsure, you should talk to him about it.
Ask him why he feels that way and let him express himself.
Or if asking him why feels too forward for you, you may take a more subtle step to gaining more knowledge.
For instance, you can ask him to arrange a meeting for you both.
If he insists on having this meeting outside of his home and without the presence of his wife, you can begin to raise your eyebrow.
Ask him about his intentions, and respectfully decline a meeting with him if he is unclear on them or if they do not align with your own values.
2. Reaffirm Boundaries
You know, there are times when we become too familiar with a married man in a platonic relationship and begin to overstep boundaries without even knowing.
Situations like this arise to help us take a look at our boundaries again.
A married man is a married man, and it doesn’t matter if he was your best friend before he got married or whatever relationship you both share.
When he gets married, he brings himself under quite a number of restrictions that prevent him from doing a lot of things he was doing as a bachelor.
These things may not be necessarily unethical, right?
But they are unexpected for a married man.
So, you should revisit your boundaries and reaffirm them.
Check where you have overstepped and retrace your steps.
And this time, try to be more strict with enforcing them.
Doing this will not only keep you both safe from betrayal and hurt, but it will also draw the line against other unethical desires that may arise in the future.
Entanglement, or being in a situationship with a married man, is one of the worst.
Because you both are not just setting yourself up for hurt, you are also dragging other people in your mud.
If you are a single woman, there are several single men out there with whom you can satisfy all your romantic needs.
Being with a married man is not only unethical, it is also illegal to some extent.
Giving in to a romantic inclined “I miss you” from a married man is your first step to becoming a party to infidelity.
Is that what you want?