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8 Signs You’re Not Ready for a Relationship

8 Signs You’re Not Ready for a Relationship

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A relationship is not something you just wake up and dive into like you’re diving into your home pool. 

You must sit down and assess yourself because you are not doing the relationship with yourself but with someone else. 

Ask yourself questions like “Am I ready for this commitment?”

“Will I bring ease and peace to my partner, or will I bring them pain and hurt?”

“Is this what I really want, or is peer pressure choking?”

These are the kind of questions you should ask yourself because even though it is so beautiful to be with your other half you may not experience the beauty if you are not ready for a relationship.

How can you tell whether or not you are ready to take this walk to paradise with that person?

In today’s article, we list signs that will help you know that you are not yet ready for a relationship.

8 Signs You’re Not Ready for a Relationship

1. Fear of Commitment

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

A relationship is a journey of commitment

I know people do all that flings and all the likes. 

But if we are talking about relationships, then we are talking about commitment.

So, if the idea of committing to one person makes you cringe, or the idea of being in a long-term relationship fills you with anxiety or dread, you are probably not ready. 

You may want to say that you have a choice to walk out on a relationship when you feel tired of the person or when you feel like you have been in it for too long. 

But will your partner(s) be completely okay with the idea?

That someone they love and are building something good with just walks out on them just because they are “tired.”

Unless you want to stay with just doing situationship. 

If you go into actual relationships with this mindset you will gather for yourself more enemies than necessary. 


2. Unresolved Past Issues

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

So you came from a relationship that broke you at the end, and everytime you think about that partner, you want to hit them real hard. 

But you’ve seen someone way better. 

And you really like this person and are ready to settle down with them.

But the thought of your ex still fills your heart with fury?

Sorry to burst your bubble, but you are not ready for that relationship. 

And if you venture it, chances are high that you will use your hand to scatter it. 

And you wouldn’t even know it. 

All that baggage from past relationships does hinder your ability to fully invest in a new relationship. 

You may feel like you are giving your everything to this new relationship, but you are not. 

The pain is still holding you back. 

If you bear any baggage from your past relationships, it is only wise that you completely resolve them before you begin to think of getting into a new one. 


3. Lack of Self-Awareness

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

Everyone needs to find themselves before they find themselves a partner.

Already, if you do not know yourself, you cannot know what type of partner you want. 

Hence, you’ll be jumping from pillar to post. 

Again, relationships are no child’s play. 

You need a deep level of self-awareness to navigate the complexities of relationships.

You should know your strengths, your weaknesses, and the things you will and will not allow. 

That way, you are also able to discover your partner’s strengths and how they complement (or don’t) you. 

You can look at a person’s excesses and tell what you can permit and what is too much excess for you. 

If you are unable to do these things for yourself, you will only subject yourself to unnecessary troubles in any relationship you enter. 


4. Dependency on Others for Happiness

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

Sometime today I was just thinking, “any relationship where you cannot be happy outside of your partner is not a good relationship at all.”

There is no ultimate guarantee on any relationship in this world. 

Unexpected occurrences happen every day, and many of them are unpleasant. 

So, everyone must be able to find happiness in themselves by themselves and for themselves. 

You should be a happy person already before you think of going into a relationship. 

If you are going around miserable and looking for someone to make you happy, what will happen when you find that person is simple:

You will drain happiness from them, and then you both will become two miserable people. 

Or they’ll tire of trying to soothe your misery every time and will leave you. 

Find your own happiness, self-worth, and fulfillment before you find a relationship.


5. Fear of Intimacy

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

Okay. Intimacy here isn’t just about sex.

(But if you are scared of sex, you should not be in a relationship.)

Some people stand for “no premarital sex” and still have great relationships. 

These ones are not scared of sex, and they just choose to keep it for marriage.

Intimacy here has to do with every side of your vulnerability. 

Your emotional and physical vulnerability. 

If you have built high walls to keep yourself safe so that nobody will “see you finish,” you should just stay within the confines of your walls and not stress someone’s child with the hope of a relationship.

Relationships require vulnerability, like the first man and woman, where “they were both naked and unashamed.” 

That’s what a relationship wants.

Maybe not physically naked, okay?

But you should be open to your partner. 

Let them see your fears and know your deepest thoughts. 

If you are not willing to share this with anyone, then you should also not be willing to be in a relationship. 


6. Lack of Time and Energy

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

Relationships are not a thing for lazy, wishful thinkers. 

Building a healthy relationship requires time, effort, and emotional energy. 

If your schedule is already packed with work, social commitments, or personal hobbies, and there is no way you can make time to check up on another human every now and then, listen to their senseless rants here and there and show up for them when they need you, you should probably bury the idea of wanting a relationship. 

The relationship needs the intentionality of time, effort, and attention. 

If you don’t have that, you most likely won’t have a relationship.


7. Desire for Freedom and Independence

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

It is normal for people to want some freedom and independence even when they are in a relationship.

In fact, it is advisable that people maintain some level of independence even when they are in a relationship. 

But being in a relationship means having someone to whom you are accountable and answerable. 

Some people don’t want that at all.

They want to do what they want when they want, and how they want. 

If you are some people, you are not ready to be in a relationship. 

Relationships will humble you. 

You must make sacrifices and compromises if your relationship will flourish. 


8. Difficulty Communicating

8 Signs You're Not Ready for a Relationship

“Oh. I don’t know how to talk to people about things.”

“I get bored out talking and talking and listening.”

I apologize. 

But when you are in a relationship, you must spend your time talking and listening. 

You can’t rob your partner of the bliss of knowing what is going on in your life. 

So, what are you going to be doing in the relationship if you do not have conversations with your partner?

When you both are together, what are you going to be doing? 

You must talk to let your partner know what you want, talk to build intimacy and strengthen your bond, and talk to resolve conflict. 

So, if you are not the “talking type,” you are clearly not ready for a relationship. 


The fact that you have noticed these signs in you today does not mean you cannot be in a relationship tomorrow.

If you are intentional about your self-improvement, you can move from being not ready to be in a relationship to being in a beautiful relationship.

And this is you, so there’s no pressure at all.

You can choose your pace and prioritize your growth and well-being before getting into that relationship.