Being a person who majors in relationship and lifestyle writing has made me constantly alert to relationships around me and the things that happen in them.
In many relationships, trust forms the foundation upon which love, companionship, and mutual respect thrive.
But you’ll know the trust in the relationship is being threatened.
Unexplainable and suspicious things will start happening.
And as soon as suspicion enters a relationship, it can cast a shadow over even the strongest bonds.
And it is true that your suspicions may not always be correct, so it is important that you know the telltale signs that your husband is seeing someone else.
So that even if you are wrong, it wouldn’t be because you are mistaken on the signs.
8 Suspicious Signs Your Husband Might Be Seeing Someone Else
1. Increased Secrecy
One of the earliest signs that your husband is having an affair is a higher rate of secrecy in your home.
If you see that your husband, with whom you used to share everything, including access to devices and whereabouts, somehow does not share things with you anymore, you should keep your eyes open.
You’ll notice that he has become more guarded with his phone, social media accounts, and movements.
He always has a petty excuse for changing his phone password and why he can’t let you in on these things anymore like he used to.
He’s definitely hiding something.
We’re sure of that one.
And that something may be that he is seeing someone else.
He doesn’t want you to see or know what he is up to, and so he’s become more secretive.
2. Unexplained Absences
There’s one beautiful thing I really enjoy about relationships: honesty thrives.
It is a fact that anyone can call you at any time of the day to ask you where your spouse is, and you’re able to give an apt answer without needing to call them to confirm.
That knowledge and confidence are such beautiful things.
It shows that there is honesty and trust between you two.
But when it gets to that place where he can’t even tell where he is or where he is headed.
When he is working late at the office and you don’t even know why.
When he has some unexplained ‘emergency work trip.’
In these kinds of situations, it is obvious that your husband is not being completely honest with you.
Especially when these unexplained absences become a regular habit.
3. Emotional Distance
When your husband starts becoming absent without explanation, you are not the only one absent from his life; he is also absent from yours.
Because if he is not there, how does he even get to know what is going on with you?
You’re asleep before he sneaks in at night, and before you are even fully awake, he is already out.
Emotional intimacy is a very important part of a healthy marriage.
And emotional intimacy is only achieved when the two parties are available and there for each other.
Maybe not necessarily physically, okay.
But there’s an ongoing connection between you two and you both are a support system for each other.
But when your husband begins to see someone else, he is probably investing his emotions in his newly found relationship; hence, there’s nothing left for you.
So on a daily basis, you both are growing apart from each other until you become strangers in each other’s lives.
4. Changes in Appearance
Change is inevitable, yeah.
And once in a while, we throw some bad habits in the trash and embrace new ones.
We move over from one belief to another; we learn, unlearn, and relearn.
But you know when you and your husband are conversational about everything.
He might decide to embrace a new habit and just tell you about it.
Even when you cannot exactly explain his reasons, at least you understand that he is embracing change.
But all of a sudden, your man begins to wear a new perfume, changes his dressing style, and makes all those changes without letting you in on anything.
Chances are, he is trying to impress someone new.
5. Defensiveness
Or defense mechanism.
When he has set up a wall of defense for himself so much that you can’t even have a sensible conversation with him.
As soon as you try to have a conversation with him, even if it is not confrontational, he becomes defensive.
Blaming you for things that do not even exist or are not related to the conversation you’re having.
Or he just becomes hostile and disrespectful to you for no reason.
Always angry about something in the house and always finding a reason to snap at you.
He’s probably setting up these defenses so that he can hide his infidelity behind them and not have you pin a single blame on them.
6. Financial Irregularities
The other day, we talked about how finances are one thing spouses must never keep from each other.
And this has been working for your family for a long time.
You know what your husband receives and spends, and he knows yours, too.
At every point in time, you both know the financial situation of the family.
As long as there’s openness and honesty in finances, a marriage is bound to thrive well.
But when there are financial secrets in a relationship, the spouse keeping the secret is taking up hot coals in their bosom.
So if your husband suddenly becomes secretive about his finances—you know, unexplained withdrawals, unfamiliar charges on credit card statements, or secretive spending habits – he’s probably spending the money on someone else.
7. Lack of Interest in Family Matters
How can a man be uninterested in issues that concern his family?
It doesn’t make sense.
This is your family, sir.
If you don’t attend family meetings or show up at important events, you’re not celebrating milestones with the family, you’re not interested in your commitment to the family, and even your responsibility at home is neglected.
It is a pathetic place to be when a man begins to act indifferent to his family and matters that concern them.
And there are a number of things that can cause this shift of interest; one of these reasons is extramarital affairs.
8. Secretive Communication
Even when technology has made keeping a secret affair way easier for people doing the act, it is still easy to know when someone is having a hidden conversation on their devices.
First off, married couples know the communication pattern of their spouse with most people.
So if their spouse is on a call with someone, they can easily tell who they are speaking with.
So when there’s someone new, they know it.
And if there’s something fishy about the conversation, they might decide to ask questions.
If a call comes in frequently from that person, they know the communication pattern.
With texts, they’ll be constantly agitated when having conversations with the person.
Or when they are not texting, they are checking their phone every other minute, and jumping at the slightest notification on the phone.
And even when you may not find evidence of these things on the phone, you know for sure there is something going on.
There’s one time something like this happened between a husband and his wife, and the wife was so afraid that she was dealing with a cheating husband.
But not too long after, we discovered that he was only planning a surprise for their anniversary.
And of course, even though she saw suspicious signs, they didn’t last for long.
Everything was back to normal in the family.
But this may not be the case in your home.
The suspicious signs that you see may indicate that your husband is seeing someone else.
So you need to give it time and observe.
And when it feels like your patience is wearing thin, you can confront him about it.
It is often advisable not to take action until you confirm your hunch.