If you know men, you will know that they are the owners of ego.
The ego is theirs.
They don’t toy with their ego for anything.
An average man protects his ego more than any other thing.
And you know how their egos work: they can push themselves beyond their limitations to achieve great things.
However, it can also be a strong barrier in their relationships, preventing them from experiencing the full potential of those relationships.
I have seen men who lost what would have been a very beautiful and blissful marriage because they loved their ego more than their spouse.
But a man with understanding knows that, from time to time in every relationship, compromises must be made.
Sometimes, that compromise may mean setting aside one’s ego for the well-being of one’s partner and of the relationship.
Well, sometimes this happens—when a man sets aside his ego for love.
Very rare occasions, but we have seen a handful.
5 Times Men Put Their Ego Aside for a Woman They Love
1. Admitting They Are Wrong
It takes a bruised and crushed ego for a man—a king—to admit that he is wrong.
It is a difficult task for women, and more so for men.
Society has not helped matters in any way by pressuring men to always be in charge and in control.
So even when they make an unavoidable mistake, they are unable to admit it for fear of being seen as failures by society.
Rather than being seen as failed men, they prefer to argue and present evidence to support their arguments.
I’ve been in one such argument with a man, and even though he was obviously wrong, he refused to admit it.
When I realized that it was ego at work, I just got up and left.
By this time, the man had already begun to make a fool of himself.
You will know that a man is in a healthy relationship when he admits his mistakes and apologizes.
It tells you clearly that he prefers his relationship and his woman to his ego.
It also shows that he is humble and ready to learn and grow.
2. Taking Career/Financial Backseat
Before now, it was an unquestionable tradition that men were the primary breadwinners of the family and women were to stay at home and build the home.
Even though there are many families that still adopt this method, the tradition is no longer unquestionable.
We have women who are homemakers rising the career ladder in their different professional fields.
Many homes now operate on shared financial responsibility to reduce the burden of provision from one person.
You can find husbands now taking major roles in homemaking to also support a working wife.
I was scrolling through my social media feed when I saw a question that read: “if a man earns $50 in one town and his fiancee earns $200 in another town, after marriage who is supposed to resign and relocate.”
Questions like this are the type I think are very unnecessary.
There are no rules to what is convenient for the couple in marriage.
Whatever works for them is what they’re to do.
But I am also aware that ego will not allow some men to resign from their lower paying job.
But I have also seen men who have understanding leave their jobs and career ambitions to focus on and support their wives because it was more promising and would serve the family more.
In this situation, the man has thrown away his ego and everything the society would think about him, and made the sacrifice that is the best for the relationship’s future.
3. Seeking Relationship Counseling
Just as it is difficult for men to admit that they are wrong, it is also difficult for them to admit that they have an issue which they cannot solve.
That is why you’ll notice that when men have issues, they are most likely to share it with their fellow men before they share it with their wives – that is, if they share it with her at all.
So having to admit that there is an issue in the relationship that he cannot handle is a tough one for him.
What is even tougher is having to seek that help from a professional.
But what they fail to understand is that they do not have complete control over life.
Sometimes, they will make mistakes and other times, things won’t go as planned.
They also fail to realize that they cannot know everything.
Their abilities are limited because they are just men.
When they come to this understanding, they discover that seeking counseling is not a sign of weakness.
And that real men who value their relationship will set aside their ego and seek help in saving the relationship.
You can tell that a man who does this is one who is ready to do the relationship long-term.
4. Sharing Vulnerabilities
Do you know that you can relate with a man for several months and you don’t see their vulnerable side?
Are you aware that there are married women who do not know their husband’s soft side?
An average man will say that when you let a woman know your vulnerable side, she will lose respect for you and will use the information against you.
Then they’ll use the biblical story of Samson and Delilah to drive home the point.
And society has done nothing to help matters.
What with mothers telling their crying baby boys “you don’t know that you are a man? And men do not cry?”
So men are conditioned to hide their emotions and appear tough while they are still suckling.
Having to share their fears, insecurities, and vulnerabilities with their woman requires immense courage and the ability to put ego aside.
And when he opens up, it allows for a deeper level of intimacy and trust in the relationship, as he shows that he is comfortable enough to be his true self in front of his partner.
5. Sharing Household Responsibilities
I talked about a bit of this earlier.
An average man expects his woman to take care of all the household chores by herself.
And if she is unable to, she can take in a maid.
In traditional gender roles, a man has no business doing any household duty.
His duty is to get up in the morning, go out in search of money, come back home to a well cleaned house and hot steaming food waiting for him.
He eats, goes to bed, and repeats the cycle.
He doesn’t do the laundry and has no idea how things get done around the house.
But today, when we look around us, we can see men who have actually dropped their ego to challenge this notion.
Men who cook for their working-class wives.
Men who have shared the responsibility of the household chores with their wives and are diligent in doing it.
Men who mow the lawn, take out the trash, and do the laundry.
And these are the men who are interested in lightening their partner’s load and demonstrating partnership and equality.
When men put their ego aside in a relationship, it does not mean that they are losing themselves.
Rather, it shows that they are finding a balance that allows both partners to thrive.
Most of the relationships where the man is able to set his ego aside for the woman he loves is usually built on a foundation of respect, trust, and mutual support.
Women really value men who prioritize them, and this action actually triples the respect they have for their man.
In the end, we really cannot separate love and humility, and those willing to embrace this balance often find deeper, more meaningful connections with their partners.