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How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage in 8 Practical Ways

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage in 8 Practical Ways

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I know few years ago, you never thought you’d be searching on how to survive a loveless and sexless marriage.

Have you gotten to the point where your marriage is loveless and sexless, and you don’t plan to leave any time soon but looking for a way to manage it?

To survive a loveless and sexless marriage, it all depends on the type of relationship you have at home. 

Many couples stay together in a loveless relationship because of the children, financial reasons or health issues because they have no other place to live independently.

Marriage is an admirable thing, and marriage is a beautiful bond between two individuals that is made to last a lifetime. 

However, as time goes on, the relationship may evolve and change because human beings change and sometimes leading to a loveless and sexless marriage. 

This can be a difficult situation to endure or manage, but not an impossible one to revive or switch to another alternative.

In addition, if your marriage is sexless or loveless due to health problems from a partner that is beyond human control, the other partner could very well still love the person for the sake of the past and humanity. 

But if the marriage is sexless due to a partner cheating, that could end the love and trust in the marriage for the other.

We all know that sex in a marriage is very important and one of the elements that intimate the couple, most marriages won’t survive without sex.

In this post, we will explore eight strategies for surviving a loveless and sexless marriage that will help your sanity.

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage In 8 Practical Ways

1. Communicate the Issue: 

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage

Communication is the bedrock of any form of relationship.

Communication is to any form of relationship as blood is to the body. 

Have you tried having an open conversation with your spouse about how uncomfortable you are with the state of your marriage? 

If you haven’t, then try it. 

Communication is vital in every relationship, and a loveless and sexless marriage is no different and even needs it the most. 

Start by opening up to your spouse about your concerns and how exactly you feel about the state of things. 

Be honest, open, and specific with what you want from the marriage. 

Listen actively to your spouse’s response, and try to understand their perspective.

No human is a mind reader neither is your spouse. 

If you are feeling unfulfilled in your marriage, talking to your partner about it is important. 

Be honest and open about your feelings, but also be willing to listen to their perspective. 

It may be that your partner is going through a difficult time and needs your support.


2. Seek Professional Help: 

A general saying said, “A problem shared is half solved”.

Seeking professional help can answer your questions and enlighten you with some useful insights and lots of information to overcome what you are going through.

If conversations with your spouse are not effective, consider seeking professional help. 

Marriage counselling and/or therapy can offer a safe and supportive environment to discuss your issues, leading to a better understanding of your needs.

Also, this will help you find practical solutions that work.

If you find that you are unable to solve this issue with your partner, or if you feel that your marriage is beyond repair, you may seek professional help before giving up. 

A marriage counsellor can help you work through your issues and develop strategies for coping with a loveless and sexless marriage. 

Do not hesitate to meet a marriage counsellor because they help without being biased.


3. Work on yourself and take time to go back to the drawing board: 

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage

If your spouse is not ready to put the effort into bringing back the marriage, it may be time to focus on yourself. 

What were your big dreams or career path before you were caught up in the web of marriage?  

What were your inspirations and goals?

It may be time to return to the drawing board and pick up your old self, then upgrade to who you desire to be. 

Consider working on your self-esteem, developing new hobbies, or embracing personal and professional development. 

Just find a way to improve your overall well-being. 

By taking care of yourself, you can show your spouse that you are still a valuable partner.

Though, it is easy to get caught up in the day-to-day routine of a loveless and sexless marriage. 

But taking time for yourself can help you to recharge and reconnect with your own desires. 

Consider taking up a new hobby, going for a walk, or reading a book to relax and promote self-care.


4. Set Boundaries: 

Being in a loveless and sexless marriage requires a lot of mental work.

You’ll need to set a lot of boundaries for you to enjoy staying in the marriage.

Have you considered setting a healthy boundary to protect your mental health? 

Do you feel there are things you can’t tolerate and things you can let slide? 

If your spouse is unwilling to work towards a solution in your current marital situation, you may need to set some boundaries. 

It doesn’t matter if he is an older man or not.

Consider what you are willing to tolerate and what actions that are deal-breakers for you. 

Be firm about your limits, and ensure your limit do not aggravate the situation.

You may need to compromise on some of your grounds to make things run smoothly in the home.


5. Create a Support System:  

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage

A loveless and sexless marriage can be an isolating and lonely experience to find yourself, but you don’t have to face it alone. 

You need someone or a group of people you know will always have your best interest at heart to work things with.

Consider building a support system of friends or family members who can provide encouragement and guidance during this challenging time. 

Friends and family who are not there to criticize you but give you all the support you need.

People who will listen and understand you without judging you.

This could be a trusted group of friends or a family member.  

The people you can otherwise call your tribe.


6. Focus on the Positive: 

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage

Can you walk down memory lane to picture when it was all good and all shades of beautiful colors. 

Yes, before a spouse turns into a monster, there was a time they were angels and the best thing that ever happened to you.

Therefore, while it is essential to address the issues in your marriage, try to remember the positives and the sweet memories you once shared.

It is advisable to focus on those things that you appreciate in your spouse and your marriage and then draw strength from them. 

This can help to reframe your perspective and improve your mood to seek for a solution or serve as a coping mechanism in remaining under the same roof.


7. Practice Self-Care: 

It is important to note that self-care and self-love are not selfish, even in the midst of a marital crisis. 

You have to prioritize your overall health in order to stay healthy to achieve rebuilding your home. 

Self-care is essential for anyone, but it is especially important in a loveless and sexless marriage. 

Make time for activities that make you feel good.

If you love TV shows,  watch a lot of TV.

If you enjoy the solitude from reading books, then read a lot of books across different genres.

Take care of your physical and emotional health, and prioritize your own needs.

Whether you take care of yourself or not, whatever will be will be.

So why not?


8. Find A Common Ground:  

How to Survive a Loveless and Sexless Marriage

We all know that marriage is really hard, it’s a huge commitment, and all marriages have their ups and downs. 

If you want to call it a quit, consider giving it time (at least a year, if not more) and think about it. 

Especially if your spouse is not abusive or violent, provides for the family, and treats you decently (not amazingly, but well enough), then you should consider staying if your children are young. 

Children need both parents while growing up because each parent have a different significant role to play in the life of their children.

More importantly, to put in mind, parents need each other too in the world of parenting because parenting young children is exhausting, even more tedious when you are doing it alone. 

It’s also financially expensive raising children in today’s world, and remember, all parenting and lifestyle expenses will double if you choose to split up.

Try to find common ground that you two can operate from without adversely affecting the other.

Consider what activities you both should be doing together and start from there to the ones you can do together. 

That way, you’d be able to coexist in the same space.


In conclusion, a loveless and sexless marriage can be incredibly difficult to navigate, but it is possible to survive and even thrive in this situation. 

By being practical and realistic with the situations in your marriage will help you find a lasting solution in this kind of case.

Big hugs and good luck to you

Amanda El-Husseini

Saturday 14th of October 2023

Very healthy and insightful points.Bless you


Wednesday 11th of October 2023

Quite helpful points.i love it