As much as people have self-care habits they indulge in to stay in good health and sound mind, couples should have self-care habits, too.
You see, in the troubles of daily living, it is quite easy for couples to forget to do things that are seemingly basic and necessary for their well-being and that of the relationship as a whole.
The other day, I saw a thread on social media where married couples came to talk about how it is necessary to schedule sex in marriage rather than wait for a spontaneous one.
Because a lot of things happen in marriage, and months can go by without any spontaneous sex happening.
I was taken aback at first.
Then as I sat down to think of it, I realized how real it can be.
Especially for couples with kids.
So yes, life happens every day, and even when you love a person so much, intentionality must be present for your relationship with them to work.
So, what are these couple self-care habits that must not be treated with kid’s gloves?
8 Essential Self-Care Habits for Couples
1. Regular and Healthy Communication
Are you asking if communication is self-care?
Imagine a couple who barely talk to each other.
If you have been in such a space, how did you feel?
Did you consider them to be people who actually love themselves, or were you asking yourself what business they both had being together?
Healthy communication between partners is a major self-care practice they cannot underestimate.
Every day, you should be able to check up on your partner to know how they are feeling.
You should discuss the highs and lows of your day and any issues that need to be attended to.
Doing this regularly deepens your emotional bond with your partner and reduces the presence of conflicts in a relationship.
2. Quality Time Together
You cannot be too busy for your partner.
If you are too busy for your partner, you might as well be too busy for the relationship, meaning that you shouldn’t be in the relationship.
No matter how busy or tight your schedule gets, there must be some allowance for your partner.
You must spend quality time with your partner every now and then, whether they are physically present with you or not.
Do a dinner date or a game time out.
Whatever it is you are doing, spending a good time with your partner is how you are able to catch up on the activities going on in their lives.
You’re also telling yourselves that “work is important and your schedule is tight, but there is always time for you.”
3. Individual Hobbies and Interests
It is also a couple self-care when both of you have individual lives, independent of each other.
The better you are as a person, the better your relationship is.
So while being there for each other and spending good time together, you both should also have alone time where you pursue your personal interests and hobbies.
You two cannot like all of the same things.
Surely, there are differences in the things you find pleasure in.
I know we do that thing where we engage in something just because the love of our lives likes to do that thing, and we’re coming there.
But it’ll be tragic to have anyone lose themselves in the pursuit of a relationship.
So choose one weekend away from the love of your life, and invest it in doing things that exclusively make you happy.
4. Physical Affection
I don’t know how it works for you, but I don’t know anything more therapeutic than a long embrace from your lover after a period of stress and all those troubles of daily living.
(I’m hearing someone say food is more therapeutic. Let’s keep that argument for another day).
But there is a legitimate reason why life is more difficult for people in long-distance relationships.
No physical affection?
A whole day of video calls and FaceTime can never replace a soft, reassuring pat on the back.
And making it a regular habit is such a beautiful way of expressing self-care between couples.
5. Exercise Together
Couples who grind together live healthily together.
Engaging regularly in physical activities improves physical health, boosts mood, and reduces stress.
And it is even easier when you get to do it with someone you love.
So you both can explore all the versatility there is to it.
You can even make it a part of your quality time routine.
You can take walks, attend fitness classes, visit the gym, and more.
Exercising together does not just improve your lifestyle, but it also makes you feel like there is something really profitable you both get to do together.
And there’s the part where there’s one person to hold up the other when they are feeling unmotivated.
6. Healthy Eating Habits
If there is one thing everyone should invest in, it is eating good food.
Nutrition plays a crucial role in overall well-being.
Good food keeps you in good shape and also keeps you in good spirits.
Boost your productivity and even your level of confidence.
Having good food is one thing; having a good lover is another.
Having the two things at the same time, you should be the most blessed person on the planet.
It is self-care to invest in eating well and right with your partner.
The both of you can learn and try new recipes together.
Cook with more fresh ingredients and eat more fresh foods.
Doing food right as a couple not only improves your physical health and your moods but also allows you to have shared experiences together.
7. Express Gratitude
Will you consider yourself to be a grateful partner or an entitled one?
It’s true that you are entitled to your partner’s love and care.
Because they are your partner, right?
What else will they be doing?
But what if your partner does not express that love and care as they do?
What if they don’t show as much support or come through for you when you need them to?
Can you force them?
The most you will do is break up with them, yeah.
But you can’t force them to be a very good partner to you.
So, you must show gratitude for every effort your partner makes to show you love and care—no matter how minute and infinitesimal.
Expressing gratitude to your partner is a way of telling them, “I do not take you for granted. I am grateful for the gift of you.”
And this expression of appreciation can go a really long way to better the quality of your relationship together.
8. Support Each Other’s Goals
Have you ever experienced a time when you were in the spotlight and your partner was not there to cheer you on?
Maybe they were unavoidably absent.
How did you feel?
There’s a different kind of energy and confidence that comes with having the one you love to believe in your dreams and cheer you on to success.
It makes you feel like you are going to win no matter what.
One healthy habit you can practice with your partner is encouraging each other, especially in pursuing personal goals.
And celebrating each other’s wins no matter how little.
Doing these things shows that you both are healthy and happy together.
Self-care for couples is a function of both partners.
One person can’t be practicing while the other is not.
It has to be done as a team if it will work.
So, both you and your partner must come to terms with the fact that you intentionally need these things to have a bubbling and smooth relationship.