When my friend called me to say, “I think my husband is getting tired of me.”
I was taken aback.
I wasn’t expecting to hear that at all.
Their marriage had been a very beautiful one, making the singles wish they were married and the married want to do better.
So I had to ask her why she thought so.
And she gave me a list of the signs she had noticed for about three months.
Three months was quite a long time.
So, I took her signs and did some of my own research.
My friend wasn’t exactly wrong.
What signs did she see?
9 Signs Your Husband is Tired of You
1. Decreased Communication
You know communication is one of the keys to a happy marriage.
The fact that the couple is able to keep conversation with each other, listen to each other, and understand each other.
So, one of the most significant signs that your husband might be tired of you in the marriage is an obvious reduction in communication.
When he was back, he used to share the details of his day and his thoughts and feelings with you without holding back.
But now, he barely talks, and when you try to get him to talk, he offers monosyllabic responses.
This may be an indication that his interests have shifted.
At this point, you need to ask him direct questions about his not engaging in a conversation with you and tell him how you feel about it.
2. Lack of Physical Affection
Men like to be physical with their wives.
No, I don’t mean violently.
Intimately.
They like to show physical affection.
You may find men who are not too emotional, who would find it difficult to express vulnerability and all.
But it is often rare to find a man who has any issues expressing physical affection.
They want to touch their wives as often as possible.
And you also need physical affection to maintain intimacy in your marriage.
So, if there is a strain on the physical affection in your marriage.
If your husband has become distant, avoiding hugs, kisses, or even casual touches, chances are he is withdrawing emotionally from you.
You know how your husband does not hesitate to feel your skin at every given opportunity.
But he somehow no longer has the time to give you a hug before running off.
Or he is too tired to receive your hug when he returns.
Oftentimes, a decline in physical affection is a play out of the decline in emotional connection.
3. Increased Irritability
One woman said, “I remember my husband to be the most gracious man I know.
If there is ever a person who gave me grace.
Who allowed me to grow and learn at my own pace, never hard pressed me for anything, and was never disgusted no matter how many times I failed; it was my husband.”
At this time, the man was the complete opposite of this description.
He snapped at her at every instance and couldn’t stand the sight of her getting things wrong.
He said she is “too slow and clumsy” for his liking.
There was a serious issue in that marriage.
When a partner grows weary of their marriage, their patience often wears thin.
They’ll become easily irritated and argue frequently over trivial matters.
If your husband has become like the husband of the woman in the story.
You know, he seems constantly annoyed or short-tempered, which might be a sign that he’s struggling with deeper frustrations within the marriage.
You should spend time observing whether this irritability is a recent development and whether it correlates with specific triggers.
That way, you can tell if it is a sign that he is getting tired of you or if it is just a one-off thing that is triggered by something.
4. Spending More Time Away from Home
Every man who loves and values his wife and marriage wants to be at home with her.
Anything that is not work and is not unavoidable will not keep him away from home.
He wants to spend as much time with his wife as possible.
So if your husband somehow has a thousand and one reasons to be away from home—whether it’s working late, spending more time with friends, or indulging in hobbies—he is probably avoiding you.
It is true that everyone needs (and deserves) to have their personal space.
And you’ll definitely know if your husband is just seeking to be alone for a while.
But a sudden increase in his time spent away from home should be concerning.
Chances are he is emotionally withdrawn from you and now he cannot stand your presence.
Without making assumptions, you can discuss this behavior with him without sounding like you’re making accusations.
Express your feelings and ask him if there’s anything specific causing it.
5. Avoidance of Future Plans
Married couples always have a plan in the books.
Maybe something for the weekend, something for the near future, or something for the future.
In a healthy marriage, couples know what they want to achieve per time, so they plan towards it.
So there’s a plan in the books, and it is still in the skeletal stage.
But your husband does not want to talk about it anymore.
He avoids the conversation about the one in the books and is not interested in making new long-term plans.
I understand how troubling it has become for you.
Bringing up future plans and noticing his uninterested reaction can be frustrating.
And if he is doing this repeatedly, it might be time for a serious conversation about where he sees the marriage heading.
6. Neglecting Marital Responsibilities
One thing I have discovered about men over the years is that fulfilling their marital duties provides them with some sort of satisfaction.
It is an ego booster.
So they like to carry out their responsibilities.
And do it properly.
But your darling husband is no longer fulfilling his household responsibilities, ignoring his parenting duties, and not being financially responsible.
Why?
A husband who is growing tired of the marriage will definitely neglect his marital responsibilities.
The more tired he gets, the less pressure he feels towards those responsibilities.
7. Frequent Criticism
Spouses in marriage are supposed to be each other’s top cheerleaders.
Healthy criticism is needed every now and then to enable improvement.
But couples should never criticize each other more than they cheer for each other.
When your husband begins to criticize you too frequently, he may be trying to tell you that he is dissatisfied and possibly tired of the marriage.
Your flaws should not be more obvious to him than your strengths.
When your cheerleader becomes your no. 1 critic, it will mess up your self-esteem.
True that you are not supposed to seek validation from anyone to know your strengths, but there is no way being constantly criticized by your husband won’t leave you wondering whether you are indeed good at what you do.
8. Indifference to Conflict Resolution
One of the signs of a healthy marriage is the ability to resolve conflicts constructively.
There is no denial to the fact that conflicts will surely abound in your marriage.
But the willingness to resolve it usually shows that you are committed to making the marriage work.
So, if your husband shows indifference towards resolving disputes or simply walks away from arguments without attempting to find a solution, it is obvious he is not interested in making the money work.
Conflict resolution is a two-man thing.
Both you and your husband must be actively involved if it will yield results.
Encourage conflict resolution by discussing issues calmly and seeking compromise.
If he remains indifferent, you may want to seek professional help to mediate and address the underlying problems.
9. Interest in Others
It takes love, respect, and self-discipline for a man to commit to one woman.
A man who has respect for his wife and for his commitment to his marriage has no business with infidelity.
He has eyes only for his wife and shuts out the idea of building connections with other people.
But if your husband is tired of you, I am not sure he still sees the need to respect you or exercise some form of self-control.
So he begins to entertain interest in others.
You know, building emotional and even physical connections outside the marriage.
So you’re watching him and you discover that he has become unusually attentive to someone else or spends an excessive amount of time with the person.
You’re not wrong to become concerned.
Understanding and recognizing the signs that your husband may be tired of you is the first step toward addressing this issue in your marriage.
And even when it gets to this stage, your marriage can still be saved.
So, seek help and make intentional efforts to rebuild your connection.