It is one thing to be with a good man, and it is another thing to be with “the one.”
Have you actually ever sat down to ask yourself if your man is truly the one for you?
If this is the man you truly want to spend your forever with.
I remember the first time I started questioning whether my boyfriend was “the one.” We had been dating for about a year.
Things were going very well, almost perfect.
But I had to call myself back.
Do we have something truly special or is this just a fleeting romance?
Before you argue with me about how a fleeting romance could not possibly have lasted for a year already, just know that many of us deal with this thought at some point in our relationships.
Well, there was only one way to know.
Pay attention to signs that would confirm my feelings.
What signs?
They are listed below.
6 Signs the Man You’re Dating Is the One
1. You Can Be Yourself Around Him
I’ve been with a man with whom I could not breathe when he was around.
It was such a difficult life to live because he was so judgemental and critical of everything I did.
So I had to literally hold my breath sometimes because I wasn’t sure if my breathing was offensive to him.
Of course, there’s no way I’d survive in a relationship like that.
So from the very beginning, it was something I had to look out for in my new man.
I had to be sure I’d survive in this one.
Guess what? I didn’t just feel like I’d survive; I noticed I felt an unusual sense of ease around him.
I mean, it isn’t like he is turning a blind eye and pretending not to see my excesses.
In fact, he calls me out whenever I do something that doesn’t sit well with him.
But the way he does it, I feel comfortable making mistakes around him.
No fear of judgment.
If you can let your guard down and be your true self around him, he’s most likely the one.
There’s no need for pretences or masks—just genuine, unfiltered you.
2. He Listens to You
I’ve not met one person who doesn’t like that the person they love sees, hears, and understands them.
And I can’t be the one breaking the record.
I love to be heard, too.
So, being with this man who not only likes to talk to me but also enjoys listening to me has been blissful.
Whenever I have something to say, no matter how trivial or profound, he pays rapt attention.
Sometimes, I wouldn’t even know he is listening until he mentions it.
He remembers the minutest of details.
Some of these things, I don’t even remember I said them.
It’s so beautiful to know that there’s someone who actually hears you.
There’s another thing he does that I really appreciate:
When he asks me for my perspective concerning a thing.
And takes it into consideration when making his decisions.
I don’t know what it is for you, yeah.
But a man who pays so much attention to me is definitely the one for me.
3. He Respects You
You may be happy being with someone who disrespects you and treats you like trash.
But that can’t possibly be my kind of person.
I am human—I have boundaries, I make decisions, and I have opinions on things.
And I need my partner to respect that.
I remember when one man was trying to woo me, and I chose not to give him any particular information about myself at that early stage.
The information was completely unnecessary to him.
But he insisted I share it, and I told him I had a choice to share or not share a part of my life with him.
He became so furious that if it were a physical conversation, I knew he’d have done something nasty to me.
Right there and then, I ended whatever it was that was yet to begin.
Because this was a clear case of “you’re not gonna get any respect from this one.”
I moved.
My man respects every decision I make and my boundaries.
Even when they do not sit well with him.
He’ll show respect for them first before he requests that we look into them for possible adjustments and compromises.
And the respect in our relationship is completely mutual.
Allows us to love each other in a safe environment.
4. He’s Trustworthy
Can you take your man’s word for it?
Or his track record of lies and deception won’t let you?
Well, not my man.
When my man says something, I do not need to second guess it.
It is what he says it is.
You see, trust is very important in any relationship.
And we all know that we cannot exactly trust someone who has not proven to be trustworthy.
Trust is a give-and-take commodity.
If a person is not trustworthy, nobody trusts them.
If a person proves themselves trustworthy, people easily trust them.
And the thing with being with someone you do not trust is the fact that you will lack peace of mind.
You’ll keep feeling like your partner will hurt you in one way or another.
My man proves to be trustworthy in every way.
He is honest with me, keeps his promises and is reliable.
He is not perfect but I don’t know one time when he deceived me or told me half-truths.
This has kept me feeling safe and secure throughout my being with him.
5. He Gets Along with Your Friends and Family
There’s a tribe in my country that says that it is the family that gets married, not the man and the woman in the case of marriage.
This goes to show how really important families are in a romantic relationship.
Especially in a long-term commitment.
As the couple come together, their families also come together and become united.
It is why it is risky to be in a relationship with a man who would not introduce you to his family or let you introduce him to yours.
Or to get into a long-term commitment with a man whose family rejects you.
Your man may love you and decide to stand for you, but the peace you would have enjoyed if they accepted you will elude you.
You’ll become the object of a toxic relationship between your man and his family.
One of the things that convinced me about my man is the fact that he did not waste time introducing me to his family.
Neither did he shy away from being introduced to my family.
My family adores him as much as he respects them.
And his family adores me, too.
Usually, if a match is not a good one, it is the families that will first notice.
6. He Handles Conflicts Well
You really cannot remove conflicts from relationships.
Every relationship will definitely experience one moment of misunderstanding or disagreement.
But will the misunderstandings in your relationship scatter your relationship or make it stronger?
I know of one relationship where as soon as they experience conflict, they break up.
A few days later, they are back to being in the relationship pending another misunderstanding.
Maybe the method works for them and makes them happy, but I think it is rather toxic, and they’ve missed several opportunities to build their conflict-resolution skills.
If they’re married, will they be getting a divorce at every misunderstanding?
Well, not exactly my business.
My man taught me how to handle conflicts with ease and grace.
Now I no longer scream at the top of my voice when he does something that hurts me.
We talk about our differences, apologize, and make amendments and compromises.
Your “the one” may not necessarily be a perfect person.
He may be an imperfect person whose imperfections perfectly complement your own.
Everybody knows what works for them.
So, your way to gauge if your man is the one who may not be on my list.
What is important is that you do what makes you happy and gives you peace.