Are you married?
No? Yes?
Aspiring to get married?
When you think about your marriage, how do you see it?
A long life of beautiful pleasantness?
Or a brief moment of fleeting pleasure?
I really doubt people think of their marriage in the latter.
A more significant percentage of people getting married usually do so with the idea of having something that will stand the test of time.
They even make a vow at the beginning to stay through in the marriage till the end.
So, what usually happens along the line?
We have more people in short-lived marriages than we have people whose marriages have lasted long.
Why?
How can you tell that your marriage will last when you’re stepping into your married life?
How can you tell that it will be different from the others?
Truth be told, marriage is one of the most beautiful and transformative experiences two people can share.
There are moments of joy, growth, and, of course, challenges.
I think it is a good thing that we have been able to gather (based on research and results from people who have actually had lasting marriages) some signs that your marriage has what it takes to go the distance for you.
If you’re aspiring to get married, newly wedded, or have been in marriage for a while, these signs will definitely guide you to a lasting marriage.
7 Signs Your Marriage Will Last
1. You Share Core Values and Life Goals
Two people cannot walk together unless they agree.
One of the first things that would help you know if your marriage will last is whether you and your partner share similar core values.
If your core values and life goals are not in sync, you and your partner will be headed in different directions.
And what is marriage if you are not walking in the same path with your spouse?
You may not agree on everything, but your visions and goals must align if you want a long-term marriage.
This will help you avoid unnecessary conflict and strengthen your bond as a couple.
2. You Support Each Other’s Personal Growth
People grow and change throughout their lives.
The day a person stops growing is the day they start dying.
People who have successful marriages know this and understand the importance of encouraging individual growth alongside mutual growth.
What is it like for you in your marriage?
Does your spouse support your dreams, encourage your passions, and celebrate your accomplishments?
Or they don’t?
You can tell that your marriage is standing on a healthy foundation that will enable it last long if you both support each other’s growth.
The best marriage is the one that allows you to grow and evolve alongside your partner.
You’re growing, and so are they.
3. You’re Still Curious About Each Other
Even when you’ve been together for years, there’s always something new to learn about your partner.
As soon as you begin to feel like you’ve seen all that there is to see about your spouse, marriage begins to get boring.
And if there’s anything you must fight against, it is boredom in marriage.
The truth is, every human is unique and dynamic.
There’s always something new to know about your spouse.
If you want a marriage to last, you must maintain a sense of curiosity about one another.
When you’re genuinely interested in what’s happening in your spouse’s life, you keeps your marriage new and fresh.
It is sweet to have an ongoing curiosity in marriage.
Your marriage will never feel stagnant; instead, it gets renewed and more interesting by the day.
4. You Handle Finances as a Team
Apart from infidelity, the one thing that causes a serious strain in marriages is financial issues.
Where couples are dishonest with their finances, or not in agreement with each other, there’ll always be stress and tension.
If you can’t trust each other with money matters, what can you trust each other with?
Do you have to agree on every financial decision?
Not necessarily.
If you can, beautiful.
But must your financial goals align?
Definitely.
You must be able to respect each other’s opinions and work together to create a plan that benefits both partners.
There should be a time where you both set aside to talk about your finances, create a budget together, or plan for the future.
Your financial partnership must be solid if you are looking for a lasting marriage.
5. You Make Time for Intimacy
Every human being needs intimacy to be able to function properly.
And I keep saying that people who are not getting intimacy from their partners are getting it from somewhere else.
Some married people have this bad habit where they become too busy to share intimacy with their spouse in marriage.
As soon as intimacy is lacking in your marriage, you just know that your marriage is headed for rock bottom.
A marriage that will last is one where both partners prioritize intimacy, both in and out of the bedroom, where they are making an intentional effort to maintain that closeness, even when life has gotten really busy.
Do you still take time for romantic gestures or connect emotionally more deeply?
Or do you have too many responsibilities?
6. You Work Through Challenges Together
Every marriage faces its share of challenges.
You know a lasting marriage by the couple’s ability to face and tackle these issues as a team.
If you’re in a marriage where you and your spouse desert each other during tough times, how will the marriage stand?
Couples who face adversity together will come out stronger on the other side.
If you and your spouse see challenges as opportunities to grow closer rather than reasons to drift apart, you’re more likely to build a lasting marriage.
Your ability to hold each other’s hands through difficult times strengthens the bond and reinforces the trust you have in each other.
7. You Feel Secure in the Relationship
One of the reasons people face unnecessary issues in their marriages is lack of security.
If a person doesn’t feel secure in their marriage, if they can’t rest easy knowing that what they have is theirs, there will always be troubles.
Quarrels here and there.
Misunderstandings, disagreements, conflicts, hatred, and resentment.
So if you are in a marriage, and you’re secure, that marriage will last.
How do I know?
Your trust that your partner is as committed to the marriage as you are.
Both you and your spouse have an unshakable bond, and you are both completely invested in the marriage.
You’re not worried about losing your spouse or losing the marriage.
And with that peace comes rest and strength that you need to keep going in the marriage.
We’re talking about a lasting marriage, not a perfect one.
Just because we’re not talking about a perfect one does not mean that we’re talking about a toxic one.
Because I’ve seen people stay in toxic marriages “till death do them apart.”
And in these cases, death often does them apart much earlier than expected.
Can we say the marriage lasted?
I think not
A lasting marriage is one where you and your spouse are committed to growing, learning, and facing life together as a team.
If you can look at these signs and boldly say that they resonate with your relationship, it’s safe to say you’re on the right track toward a long and happy union.
If not, it is never too late to adjust and achieve what you truly want from your marriage.