It is a popular opinion that men are more given to physical intimacy than women.
So it definitely will raise concern in any home if the husband is not touching the wife.
If the wife is not touching her husband, she may just need a little bit of counseling, and it is done.
But it is a major concern if the man is not touching his wife.
I even heard an argument that if a man is not touching his wife, he is definitely touching someone else.
This argument is not completely accurate and lacks basis.
There are several reasons why a man is not physically intimate with his wife.
Men go through things that we can only know if we have access to their minds.
So, your husband is not touching you?
Based on access into the minds of men, let’s see the possible reasons.
9 Reasons Why Your Husband Does not Touch You
1. Stress and Fatigue
It is good for a man to want to work hard to ensure his family’s financial security and all.
But as a woman, you must normalize encouraging your husband to take rest and breaks from time to time rather than add to his stress.
A high level of stress and pressure is often equal to a low level of sexual desire.
By the time he returns home from all that stress, all he wants to do is sleep.
Touching you now becomes something that has to be pre-planned in your home.
It doesn’t have to get to that, and you can help with it.
2. Mental Health Issues
The number of people struggling with mental health challenges today just keeps on increasing.
And I wonder why.
Mental health challenges like depression, PTSD, OCD, etc., can be the reason your husband is not touching you.
But how would you even know this if you have not come to terms with the fact that he is going through a mental health challenge?
These challenges often affect people’s self-esteem, sexual drive, and even their ability to connect with their loved ones emotionally.
If your husband is in this place, he needs to see a therapist.
3. Medications
Following mental health challenges some prescribed medications for mental health challenges can affect a man’s behavior toward physical intimacy.
Some of these medications, such as antidepressants or mood stabilizers, have side effects that reduce libido and sexual desire.
This can make it difficult for your husband to initiate physical intimacy or even respond to your advances.
So, if your man is taking these medications and you have noticed that he is no longer touching you, you may want to consult with a pharmacist or a doctor for medical advice.
4. Performance Anxiety
You know that thing that happens when someone suddenly loses interest in continuing with a particular thing after receiving a discouraging review.
It can happen to your husband and his sexual drive.
Maybe you weren’t the one who gave that review, but it will definitely make him anxious about his performance with you.
It could also be that he feels he doesn’t meet the standards of your previous lovers.
This thought alone can breed performance anxiety in him, making him afraid that he may not meet up to your expectations or he may just embarrass himself.
If your husband is feeling like this, he may decide to stay away from touching you just to preserve his ego.
5. Lack of Connection
The truth is, it is not every couple that shares chemistry.
Without that emotional connection, sexual intimacy in a marriage is always kind of a stressful routine that the couple will rather skip if they can.
So yeah, the fact that you and your husband do not connect emotionally like that may be the reason he doesn’t bother with touching you.
Physical intimacy in marriage is often a representation of something deep going on between the couples.
Like my people will say, “If e no dey, e no dey.”
6. Past Trauma or Abuse
The things people go through in life, especially in their romantic relationships, play a major role in determining the level of their sexual drive and behavior towards physical intimacy.
Many people experience trauma in their relationship, but I am of the opinion that it is worse when a man experiences it.
Why?
We live in a society where men are not permitted to share their pains and fears.
They are only expected to be “a man,” and that means they must bury whatever pains or trauma they may be experiencing and go on acting like nothing is wrong.
A man who has experienced trauma in his past relationship may have to struggle with trust issues and may fear intimacy depending on what his past woman put him through.
7. Hormonal Imbalances
The trouble of lack of intimacy in your marriage may also stem from hormonal imbalances.
You know all that issues with low testosterone levels and the likes can cause low libido and reduce sexual desire in men.
Hormonal changes are usually caused by aging or medical conditions
Even lifestyle factors that we often consider not-so-serious, like excessive alcohol consumption, smoking, poor diet, lack of exercise, and high levels of stress, can contribute to hormonal imbalances that affect sexual health.
Does your man not engage in exercise and doesn’t feed well but goes through a lot every day for the family?
He may soon begin to lose appetite in physical intimacy with you.
8. Infidelity or Betrayal
Infidelity is such a huge deal breaker in marriages so much that it has been confirmed the major reason why people get divorced in marriage.
Very few people decide to stay in marriage after discovering that they have been betrayed by their spouse.
And within this number, a greater percentage have to struggle with a lot of emotional trauma that restricts them from relating with their partner the way they should.
If you have been in an extramarital affair or have done something that betrays your husband’s trust in you, your husband will sort of find it difficult to share physical intimacy with you.
Here’s another unpopular thing.
Do you know that your husband can refrain from touching you if he is cheating on you?
Yeah.
The guilt and shame from knowing what he is doing may make him lose the boldness to share intimacy with you.
So, whether it is you cheating or he is the one cheating, infidelity can spoil the intimacy you share with your husband in marriage.
9. Physical Illness or Discomfort
When people are sick, the major thing on their minds is how to get well.
Aside from the fact that sickness can disable them temporarily, sickness can also make them lose their appetite for a lot of things that bring them pleasure, including physical intimacy.
If your husband is sick and is not touching you, forgive him.
And do everything you can to see that he gets better.
It does not really matter whether it’s a headache or a chronic condition.
As long as he is sick, he may not have the desire to touch you.
Worse off if it’s a communicable disease.
He won’t even want to be anywhere near you so that you do not contact it.
Once he is well and back on his feet, he should make up for all the time he lost not touching you.
So, the fact that your man is not touching may not always mean that he doesn’t like you or that he has issues with you.
It may mean that, but it is not always the case.
If from following the list here, you cannot decide the reason he is not touching you, ask him about it.
It is the reason we were given the ability to communicate—to address most of our problems.
So talk to your husband about your concerns and see to it that you both clear the air and restore physical intimacy in your family.
If you see the need to, you can bring in a third party.
Maybe a counselor or a therapist.