Everyone wants a future with their partner, be it dating, in courtship, being engaged or married. The goal is to have lasting happiness and peace with the one we love. However, it is paramount for people to fall in love with someone who shares similar dreams, beliefs, interest, desires, hopes and fears with them.
Relationship goals helps lovers to make their bond stronger and take their relationship to next level. Relationship goals are best referred to as a loose guideline on how to best give and receive love in your relationship, nothing more and nothing less. Relationship goals should focus on facts and not fantasy.
Here are Some Tips of Goals to Set in Your Relationship
Communication: It is essential for couples to discuss their goals before hand, and work towards achieving it as days goes by. You should always let your partner know they are on your mind. Send text messages or chat when apart. Make time to check in with your partner on a daily basis. Put their special dates on your calendar, if you have to. Speak to your partners on your feelings and give them room to speak about theirs. This is vital to create strong bond and maintain a healthy relationship.
Understand each other: People have different ways of speaking love language. Ensure to understand the language your lover is speaking. Your partner feels relaxed and open to express themselves when you not only understand what your partner is saying, but also how they say it.
Understand and Respect each other’s religious belief: Couples should discuss their religious views and respect it, to avoid chaos. Many spouses practice different religion and it doesn’t affect their bonding¸ while some prefer to go for someone who shares same faith with them.
Discuss if to have kids and how many kids: It’s funny how most people in the society assumes that all married couples wants to have children. However, it is necessary for couple to discuss if they want kids and how many to have, and should be prepared to jointly answer friends, family, colleagues who would ask numerous questions regards this decision. If a partner wants kids and the other doesn’t, then it is better to consider that before taking such relationship to next level, as it can make love turn sour in the future.
To wed or not wed: Some people believe they would live a happy and fulfilling life with their partners without being married. Some couples are termed “common law partners”, other than being husband and wife. In some countries, these common law partners who cohabit together for a certain number of years are entitled to tax breaks, shared health benefits and other benefit same as a traditional married couple would get. On the other hand, there are people who choose to never marry simply because they enjoy the essence of maintaining their freedom despite being in a loving and committed relationship. However, this is a personal choice, but one should spell it out to the other partner to be sure they are comfortable with that.
Having regular date night: Life hustles may affect romance in relationships, but amidst the day to day running of business and career, it is important to schedule dates, have time out and reassure each other of the love you share. Engaging in activities together brings something to the relationship that both partners can relate to. The memories will help build a stronger bond.
Give each other some personal space: Sometimes people get carried away when head over heels in love, they natural want to spend as much time as possible with each other. On the contrary, most people if they want to be sincere would admit they equally need some time alone once in a while. It doesn’t mean one is getting tired of their partner, but it is an avenue to recharge, so that they can return to their regularly scheduled program being more relaxed and appreciative of what they have which is you.
Define how to manage your partner and extended family: Learn to prioritize the need of your partner above everyone else. This is difficult, afterall family is family. Sometimes, your partner needs your attention as much as your other family members, but you should be able to strike a balance.
Effective Argument: Arguing or fighting one’s partner may be unavoidable. Sometimes, they may make one downright angry, it is therefore important to argue effectively and compassionately, not using hurtful words. Arguing is a normal and healthy part of any relationship, but couples shouldn’t go to bed angry or go a day without resolving controversy. To fight constructively, We need to express our candid opinion with kindness and love. It may be better not to react immediately, one may have to calm, take a time out and revisit the issue when cooler heads can prevail.
Having your own life outside of your Dating Life: It is important during dating and even in marriage, for women and men to “have their own life”. For clarity, it’s not about partying it up like “being single and ready to mingle”. But, that your business, professional, personal, and entertainment goals should not be neglected for the sake of being in a relationship. Although, it is very important to incorporate the interest of each other while dating, engaged or married in the plans to attain these self development goals, this will bring about unification of the partnership you are both creating. It is important to keep in mind that, being in a relationship does not mean that you leave behind everything you love to do, your purpose, mission, goals in order to make a relationship work.
Respect each other: It is paramount to respect each other, if your partner doesn’t value your time, opinions, beliefs, when you’re dating, it may be difficult to change when the relationship gets to the next level. Lack of respect is synonymous to being verbally, emotionally or physically violent towards your partner.
Share similar values: The values of partners must align for things to work. This is the foundation to building a loving and long-lasting relationship. For instance, if a person whose values are honesty and integrity fall in love with a thief, then there will be problem. If a partner loves travelling or loves sport and the other doesn’t, it will be better to reach a compromise as people don’t really get to change.
Follow through with promises: Though, things happen while people live, but it’s not enough to always have excuses for everything. Consider how the other person will feel when you cancel dates, trips because of work or other reasons. It is also unfair to be in another relationship with someone else when you have mutually agreed to be committed to another in a serious relationship. Not keeping to promises often lead to stress, mistrust, anxiousness and worry in the other lover.
In conclusion, there are numerous goals to set and works towards attainment, in other to build and sustain a healthy and long lasting relationship. However, remember that you’re the pilot of your airplane and the writer of your script. No one but you can decide what your relationships and life should look like.